I’ve continued to feel incredibly discouraged and pessimistic about this cycle. I’ve had a few cramps here and there, but no return of the OHSS symptoms, which I figured must mean that implantation did not occur. My beta is scheduled for Tuesday. I decided that I wanted to start testing so that I could break the bad news to myself gradually rather than waiting for a single devastating phone call from some unpleasant nurse on Tuesday. So I broke down this morning.
I don’t even feel happy yet. I am too worried:
a) that it is residual trigger (although I triggered 14 days ago today–that should be long enough, right?);
b) that the line is too faint for 7dp5dt, indicating a chemical pregnancy (I also tried an internet cheapie Wondfo, and although a line eventually developed after 10 minutes or so, it is a real squinter and didn’t show up in a photo at all); or
c) that it’s some other kind of mistake.
Now I’m obsessively comparing my test to photos of others’ at 7dp5dt and finding that it appears lighter than just about all of them…although we also only transferred one embryo so there’s essentially no chance of twins for us. Why do I do this to myself??